Well, it was just a go-through-the-motion day. What’s new?

The only thing I did differently today was – I have finally tried YAMI YOGHURT. Haha.

I wanted “Honeydew” but it was sold out. “Peachie” too… –_- What a bad first experience. They could have put a sign or something to indicate???

So I ordered “Winter Melon” which has quite an awful first taste but got better subsequently, so I was fine. :)

Bumped into a friend and she commented that I’ve slimmed down, that was what Emma told me yesterday too! *Beams*

However, I looked into the mirror and was not convinced… =/ I don’t even exercise now.

But well, it is probably due to my loss of appetite? When I wake up in the morning, food is not one of the first thing on my mind now (usually it is. =P)

And also probably due to my timetable which is nicely planned such that breaks in between lessons are minimised. :)

 

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Whatever is it, school is kinda plain now. People are acting strange and I am not motivated to study at all. To think that I used to love studying when I was younger… But somehow along the way I just lost it.

(Btw studying does not = learning.)

I must admit that I am never a hardworking person and complacency is a big issue for me. That’s probably why I’m better in subjects which doesn’t have a definite answer and doesn’t require much memorising. :)

I love those subjects. Think along GP, literature and stuff like that…

After all, you can always find definite answers in textbooks, why the need to memorise?

 

*shrug*

Can someone give me a good reason???????????????????????

With a sensible rationale, I think my grades are more likely to improve. It is because I can’t see the reason behind doing something, which causes such reluctance to do it.

This has always been on of my biggest mental conflict.  It’s agonising.

 

On the other hand, I am happy with my relationship with my cello now though. :) I look forward to practising after school each night :) My teacher must be happy to know this haha.

Reason is simple.

I practise, and actually see the result. This acts as a super positive reinforcement which makes me wanna improve more.

And I’m not practising for any exams or to please anyone. It is just a pure desire to want to improve just because. There is no string attached and the only pressure comes from myself.

 

This is such a huge irony, certainly a field of study psychologists might be interested in. I will willingly be a research participant anytime, in hope that they might be able to come up with a solution and revolutionalise the entire education system.

(Participated in 2 Psychology researches today… And more to come! Because they made it compulsory.)